Uncategorized – Betsy Schow

No Turning Back

Some people are born without fear. They can charge towards something without a second thought.

I am NOT one of those people.

Don’t get me wrong, I still finish whatever I start. But that doesn’t mean when I’m about to climb a mountain (real or metaphorical), I don’t stand at the bottom and get vertigo seeing how far away the top is.

If I want to get up that mountain, I’ll do a gut check and realize that the distance is really just an accumulation of steps. “I can do steps,” I’ll tell myself. “I can break it down and make it 300 ft to that rock.” After I get to that rock then I figure, “I can make it 500 ft to that tree.”

Before I know it, I’m half way. But I’m tired. More likely than not I have a few blisters and the path down is looking pretty good because I don’t want to take another step. Here’s a secret though…

Running away and quitting in the middle has just as many steps back down as going forward to the top. And there’s no way I hauled my butt up half a mountain just to pack in my trail mix. So as long as I can keep moving, it’s going to be up.

One of the keys to fighting fear is making a commitment that there’s no turning back. Because as long as I see heading back down as an option, I’ll keep nervously looking over my shoulder at the possible way out. Once I choose to take away that option, something miraculous happens: peace. Peace and determination that all I have to do or think about is taking those steps forward.

Whether its easy, hard, slow or fast — doesn’t matter. Just get there and enjoy the view from the top. It’s much better than the one from the bottom.

CASTING CALL FOR MTV TRUE LIFE

If you are familiar with my book, you probably know I really struggled with being much heavier than my skinny husband. It nearly killed our marriage, mostly because I was obsessed about it. But he shared some of the blame as well. Thankfully, we were able to overcome it and save our marriage, and that was before I ever even lost a pound. It’s a lot about being open and honest about feelings and what the real cause of your unhappiness it. Sometimes we become too close to the situation and are blind to what is really happening.

MTV True Life is doing a show on just this issue and they’ve asked for my help in finding people to be on the show. Going on TV and showing the world your feelings can be tough, I understand. But the amount of mail I have received from my husband’s and my appearance on the Today Show proves that television and books can be a powerful way to reach out and get help or help others. I’m going to post their casting call, and if you think you fit the bill, you can reply here or email me and I will get you in contact with the director of the show instead of mucking through email circles.

Even if a TV show isn’t right for you, get help and a healthy flow of communication flowing. No matter how much you love someone, if you feel belittled or judged, that love will die. Including the love we have for ourselves when we are the ones making snide remarks at our reflections.

Finishers Needed

Hey all you finishers! It has been a wild ride – Newspaper articles in the Wall St. Journal, going on the Today Show, lots of local radio and TV. I even sold out my whole first print run! And with all of that, I have a favor to ask. I have a something for you to finish: a review of the book.

Reviews on Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble, and Deseret Book really help me get my book out there. Book buyers from bookstores use reviews when deciding which books to stock in their stores. The more I can get, the better. So if you have read Finished being Fat, and it made you laugh, cry, or think a little bit about your own happiness — then please, tell everyone else about your experience.

You should be able to leave a review on these sites, even if you didn’t purchase them there. You might need an account though. The review doesn’t have to be long, and you can use the same on multiple sites.

Click here to review on Amazon Just hit “Create your own review” and sign in

Click here to review on Barnes and Noble. Type your review and sign in

Click here to review on Deseret Book

Thank you everyone. I’m busily working on the sequel, but I love to hear from you. You can connect with me on our Facebook page or email me at betsyschow@gmail.com

Gym-aphobic

Does the gym make you get hot flashes and break out into a sweat? Before you even walk into the door, that is.

Many people suffer from Gymaphobic tendencies. Twitching uncontrollably at the thought of spandex in full length mirrors. Random turret-like swears at the high tech weight machines. Nasty thoughts directed at the Barbie doll on the elliptical.

It’s okay. You’re not alone.

Getting to the gym is tough. Not only do I have to commit myself to a specified time of torture, but I also have to worry about looking good while doing it. You think losing seventy-five pounds would assuage these fears. Not so much. Now I feel like everyone’s watching me. Plus, in the high intensity classes, even with all the pants sizes I’ve lost, I’m still the big girl in the room next to the dancing twigs with sports bras and abs.

Thing is, the only one looking at me, is probably me. Everyone else is too worried about their own backside jiggling to even notice mine.

When we build up an imaginary obstacle, the climb to get over it feels every bit the real thing.

So here are my two tips to push past the gym phobia.

Realize that even those tight bodies have bumps and lumps they want to get rid of. Otherwise they wouldn’t be there.

And if you are wearing a tank top, always make sure to shave your underarms and add deodorant. Guys too.

Full Body: Take the darn compliment

Allow me to take you to my Spanish class today. When I handed my teacher the homework, she commented that I had “really nice arms”. So what immediately pops out of my mouth? “Yeah if you like sausages.” To which the teacher responded, “You like sausages?” (she’s from Peru… lost in translation)

Point is, when someone offers me a compliment, I feel the need to add a little bit of self deprecating snark. Do you do this too? Why are we so ready to see the bad and flaws, yet so reticent to jump on the success train?

In my pysch class, forever and a day ago, I heard it takes 5 positive comments to balance one negative. If you have a little inner critic, complaining about body parts all day, is it any wonder the scale leans heavily on the negative?

So here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to try to make a conscious effort to take the darn compliment. With no additives. And not just hear it and brush it off, saying the snarky little comment in my head. Internalize what the person is saying. Give the person’s opinion weight and validation.

Join with me in telling the little monkey in our heads to stop throwing poo. What’s that song? “Accentuate the positive… eliminate the negative…”

If you can’t say something nice…

You should always listen to what your momma says you know. If you can’t say something nice, keep your yap shut. Especially in politics.

If you haven’t noticed, there’s a pretty big election coming up this year. And so far I have no clue why I should vote for either one of these yahoos. I’ve heard an earful of why I shouldn’t vote for the other candidate though.

It makes me ill that every time I turn on the news or check Facebook, there are pictures of Romney in a KKK outfit, or Obama looking like Hitler. Come on people. How exactly is this helpful, to anyone? To swipe a line from Buddha, It’s like poisoning yourself and hoping the other guy falls dead. Because make no mistake, this negative crap is poisoning you and everyone around you with hate. If you are a person that spreads these offensive and often false images and stories, do you realize how that makes you look?

So here’s my impassioned plea to my friends and family on both the left and right… stop throwing poo at the opposing candidate. This goes for the campaigns themselves too. All we hear is how one of them is going to ruin America. I for one would like to hear what you- or your candidate of choice- are going to do to make America better.

Stop using bully scare tactics. Stop kicking the other guy in the nuts. If the only reason to vote is so the other guy doesn’t win, we are screwed.

Snack Smart: Foods that keep you slim – from Melanie Douglass

Today I am up to my ears in homework. So I am going to let someone else do the heavy lifting. This is a great article/video from Studio 5’s Fitness Correspondent, Melanie Douglass.

http://studio5.ksl.com/?nid=56&sid=21275419

Check it out!

Fitness Tip: Coming back from an injury

One month ago I was running 26 miles. This week I’m topping out at 6. And even then I’m going slower than molasses.

But that is the point. After an injury, it’s tempting to try and make up lost time. I know that’s what I’m itching to do. I’ve just had 3 weeks of low impact exercising which means that I have burned about a 1/4 of the calories per week than I normally do. My weight loss is slow and I can see my calves turning to jello.

But if I tried to pick up where I left off, I would injure the healing muscles and be out for even longer. So when coming back from an injury, take your time. Literally. Make each mile a minute or two slower than pre injury. If you were at 60 minute sessions on the elliptical, try 30 minutes with stretching before and after.

Most importantly, listen to your body. If you feel sharp pain… STOP. Right then. Not after you’re done with your workout. Sore is ok. Pain is not.

Injuries happen to athletes at every level. Stretching and slow increases in intensity will not only help your recovery, but help prevent injuries in the first place.

Full Body: Serenity Prayer for Weight Loss

I truly believe that the Serenity Prayer, used in AA and other support groups, fits perfectly for people with body issues.

Here’s my version of the Serenity Prayer for weight loss.
“God grant me the strength to stick to a healthy lifestyle. Give me the will to persevere and change the things I can and accept the things that I can’t. And the wisdom to tell the difference.”

I can change my body into a healthy, fuel efficient machine. It can be smaller and sleeker and stronger. But no matter what I do, I can not be in my 20s again. I cannot change my body type into one of those slight elf like creatures. I can’t get any taller. And my face will always have chubby cheeks.

So why spend precious time and energy bemoaning the aspects that I cannot change. Next time you get discouraged, think of this post and say my Serenity Prayer. Save your energy for the stuff you actually can change and let God bless us with the acceptance to love ourselves as we are.

Weekly weigh in 152.2 -1.8 lbs

Snack Smart: Salads are not always low calorie

Are you trying to lose weight? So you automatically pick the salad off the menu? Sadly, salad does not always equal low calorie or healthy.

Most commercial salads have cheese, croutons, some have breaded chicken or bacon, maybe guacamole. None of these things are bad per se. But they certainly hike up the calorie count. The worst offender is the dressing! You can easily use 300+ calories just on 2 tablespoons of dressing. Ugh that’s a bag of M&Ms.

So make your own fresh and yummy salad. Here’s mine: fresh diced tomatoes, cucumber slices, fresh lettuce. Tossed with balsamic vinegar straight from the cooking bottle. Not the vinaigrette dressing. Yum and under 150 calories.